cont

I look at the clock on the wall just as I do the train pulls up. Finally something convenient happened today. I notice that the bum has left. He probably was bored of me more than I was of him. As I get on the train I see a seat available next to a woman who is probably the same age as the girl that I left only an hour and a half ago. If you gave this woman only an 8 ball she wouldn’t be that different from this woman. I start to walk over to the chair to sit down and I can feel her eyes follow me each step of the way. She is obviously disgusted. She gets up practically the second I sit down. Gee I guess being even a little subtle was out of the question for this girl. She does not take the time to look for a new seat and just stands. All right, more room for me. I’m repulsive I know this, do I care? NO absolutely not. I have lived this long without a soul and I believe I can die without one. Heaven or hell wouldn’t want me.
The subway continues down the tracks as I pass in and out of sleep. My stop is the last so this is where I catch most of my sleep after a hard days work, if that’s even what you can call it. I peruse the train and I come to a familiar sight. I find that my usual spot was still intact. I move to a corner that I always crash in. No one ever sits in it, as it has become well known that it is my spot. Sort of reserved for my seniority of sin. I laugh to myself at the thought that the only plus side to my existence is an empty seat in the corner of a smelly subway to come home to. Father would be proud of his beloved Christopher. I was always his favorite. Ha! Who am I kidding? He loved me just as much as people love kanker sores. But when he drank, that was when it was my time to shine. We would go around back behind his work office in the alley during the middle of the night and he would go in to play cards and I would wait outside, sometimes for hours and hours on end. I wasn’t there so he could keep an eye on me but rather so that I could use my small size to his advantage. Coat checks were always a must in these back alley gambling rings and I would often go through the pockets of my father’s fellow gamblers. No one would pay attention to the small child of a drunken accountant. Most days I scored big, a Rolex here, credit card there, but there was some days where the businessmen would not have much on them. That’s when I got it. I got it good when I didn’t find anythin